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Where do we go from here? Part 2 August 28, 2006

Posted by table4five in BlogHer, I like me some people, personal thoughts.

WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?(Dawn)        Where do we go from here?
(Buffy & Spike)
 Where do we go from here?
          The battle’s done, and we kind of won,
(& Tara)
      So we sound our victory che -er.
                    Where do we go from here?

(Xander & Anya) Why is the path unclear?
                    When we know home is near?
Understand we’ll go hand-in-hand
                    But we’ll walk alone in fear.
                 – Tell me!
(All)             Where do we go from here?
                    When does the end appear?
                    When do the trumpets cheer?
                    The curtains close on a kiss, God knows
                    We can tell the end is ne – ar ….fades
                      Where do we go from here?

Who knew so many songs had those words in them? But this is the song I meant.

Also, I feel I should add that my 2011 “A-list” didn’t include Karen, Grace, Jenn, Jenny, Meghan, Carmen or Chris, because duh-everyone knows who they are already!

But I did forget Miss Once More With Feeling herself, JENNSTER!, Fancypants Jess (who needs to come to BlogHer next year!), Amy, Christina , Elizabeth, and…oh crap, just EVERYBODY, okay? EVERYBODY is the “A-list” as far as I’m concerned. If you’re putting some words onto some kind of blog, then you’re important to me.

And if it ever seems like I’m getting too big for my britches, you all have permission to smack me hard for it. Now please make sure to read the post below this one, and leave your own thoughts in a comment. Let’s all give each other a nice big blog hug, mmmkay?


Where do we go from here? August 27, 2006

Posted by table4five in BlogHer, personal thoughts.

warning: extremely long post full of name-dropping ahead. Also, bonus points if you know the song I’m referencing in the post title.
Tuesday is my one year Bloggiversary. I know it is SO cliche, but if you had told me a year ago that I would still be doing this, that it would impact my life the way it has, I would have said I doubt it. I’m getting a new blog ready, and once I do I will probably rerun a few of my favorite posts from the last year. In the meantime, I’d like to share some post-BlogHer thoughts with you, brought on by this post from Very Mom. Enjoy.

A month ago, I got on an airplane and flew to California to attend BlogHer. I had absolutely no idea what was waiting for me when I got there. I had never attended any kind of conference, so I imagined something like the training sessions I went to when I worked at the credit union. A large boring room with a huge table and metal chairs, a person standing in front of a pull-down screen, and lots of note-taking.

I knew there would be “poolside cocktail parties”, and so I made an image in my head of a small hotel pool with people standing around awkwardly holding drinks and making small talk.

I had no idea what was ahead.

And now, looking back, it’s like I went to Blog Disneyland and rode all the rides and spent too long out in the sun until I couldn’t possibly go another minute. Like others, I came home riding a wave of empowerment and validation that lasted weeks, weeks during which all I wanted to do was read about BlogHer and look at BlogHer photos and talk about BlogHer until my family wished I would just shut up about BlogHer already and cook them some damn dinner.

The biggest “scandal” at BlogHer wasn’t the showing of boobs, the molesting of statues or the pole-dancing, it was the Friday morning blog post of a fellow attendee who wrote about how sitting near a group of Mommybloggers made her want to do unmentionable things to their unmentionable body parts. I have since seen this blogger in Flickr photos, sitting with Heather and Leah and all I can think is, obviously she likes some Mommybloggers, just not all of them.

The whole “A-List” blogger thing really ticks me off (not the bloggers themselves, the bitching about them). I have something of a theory about it, and it goes something like this: Once upon a time, very few people were blogging. It started out with LiveJournal, and message boards, and people wanting to have more space to write in than just a small comment box. There is a group of bloggers who have been at this for years, and who have come to know each other. I imagine they have learned each other’s fears and secrets, have helped each other through difficult times and celebrated successes together. When they get together, they form a natural group who share a common bond.

They are also generally good at blogging, have spent years honing their writing skills and finding their voice, and because of that, they get a lot of hits and can now make money selling ad space. Advertisers seek them out because of the very simple advertising formula that lots of readers=lots of people seeing the ads=lots of people potentially buying the goods or services.

So if it’s that simple, then why all the grumbling about how the “popular” bloggers only wanted to talk to each other, how they partied in their hotel rooms instead of by the pool, how they went out to dinner together instead of eating cold taquitos with the rest of us? Why the complaining about how only they get asked to run ads and how it’s not fair for everyone else? I just don’t see it that way.

Here’s what else I think, and I’m going to use as examples the bloggers that I knew when I went to BlogHer, but I am not specifically excluding anyone who wasn’t there-If, in five years, Nancy, Tammie, Dawn, Roo, Liz, Julie, Izzy, Suebob, Catherine, Kristen and I (did I forget anyone?) are still blogging, we might just be the “A-list”. We might go to BlogHer 2011 (God, I just felt a chill down my spine) and feel just like Heather, Eden, Alice, Maggie, Jen, Melissa, Leah and Angela do. We might want to just sit together, just party together or just eat together because we have had five years of friendship. Five years of sharing, supporting, and encouraging each other that will bond us together. Will we act bored when new bloggers excitedly squeal when they meet us? Will we chat politely while looking off in the distance for someone else? I sincerely hope not. Does it even matter if we are the “A-list” or if there even IS a list? Absolutely not.

My point is that like the saying goes, you have to walk a mile in someone’s shoes. Imagine being Heather Armstrong for a minute. Whether you like it or not, you are probably the most popular blogger anywhere. Everyone wants to look at you, try to meet you, talk to you. You want to see your friends and have a good time just like everyone else. But there’s always the knowledge that wherever you go, people are looking at you like you are an exotic zoo animal. Wouldn’t you prefer to go out to dinner with your friends and party in your room too?

The other point I want to make is that another thing the “A-list” has in common, and has in common with me and many of my friends too, is that they are all Mommybloggers. There was plenty of complaining at BlogHer about that, too. I say if there is another group of bloggers that wants to band together, stand up and be noticed, then let’s see them. If next year’s BlogHer is all about food bloggers or craft bloggers or political bloggers, that’s fine with me. I know who I am, I know what my place is in the Blogosphere, and I know who my friends are.

So I say let’s stick together, share and support and encourage, and let’s remember to help new bloggers, too.

Oh, and next year, if I happen to be sitting right in front of Heather Armstrong at a session like I was this year? I’m going to say “excuse me, hi, I’m Elizabeth” instead of gawking at her over my shoulder. She’s not a zoo animal after all.

Sweetener, condoms and bibs, oh my. August 7, 2006

Posted by table4five in BlogHer.

I must be extremely easy to please, because I only have one small complaint about the sponsors’ products given to me free at BlogHer ’06. I didn’t like the free bottled water. That’s it. Other than that, I was grateful for the things I could use, and not at all bothered by the things I couldn’t use.

Unfortunately, not everyone is as easy as me (heh). Every post I read criticizing the organizers of BlogHer for not including every possible demographic in their sponsorships, every post I read complaining about that damn condom, that damn bib, do they think all I care about is reproduction?, it makes me sick to my stomach.

Maybe other people are used to going to conferences at fancier hotels, where there either are no sponsors or the sponsors’ gifts are much more expensive, I don’t know. It’s ludicrous to suggest that putting a baby bib and a condom in the swag bag implies that the focus of the conference is on “white, married, heterosexual women” (sourduck.blogspot.com).

I saw lots of different people at BlogHer; male, female, black, white, asian, as well as some that I suspect are fairly well-off, and some like me that were there because someone else paid for their registration (and plane tickets, and room). I met married couples, single women, single men, and a lesbian with whom I shared a heartfelt and much appreciated conversation about how both of our sons have the same learning disability.

Truthfully, what I appreciated most about BlogHer ’06 was the time to myself. Well, not myself exactly, since the only time I wasn’t surrounded by people was when I was in my room. But I didn’t have to parent anyone, or be a spouse to anyone, I could just be me. I appreciated walking into lobby of the Ballroom and having there be hot coffee waiting, and fresh pastries just for me. I appreciated being able to eat lunch without having to feed anyone else first. I appreciated thick frosted brownies on the snack table after lunch, which were delicious and again, not made by me.

And yes, while I had no use for the condom (I’m fixed), didn’t like the taste of the bottled water and thought the sweetener tasted like unflavored pixie sticks, I appreciate each and every one of the sponsors. Because of them, everyone who attended paid a much lower registration fee than what it actually cost. According to Elisa Camahort, registration might have covered the food bill. Please take a minute and click on that link and read the whole post. It explains exactly why there were sponsors for BlogHer.

When I walk into registration on the first day of BlogHer ’07, I won’t be surprised by the sight of sponsors’ tables. I’ll happily take a tote bag or whatever it is if anything, and I’ll use what I can and either throw away or donate whatever I can’t. I only have one request-PLEASE find a different water sponsor. One whose water, you know, TASTES GOOD.

edited to add: I got an email from Susie Bright after leaving her a comment on a post, and she asked me to pass along this article that mentions her breastfeeding during an interview.
The link is at

  • SusieBright.blogs.com
  • Breastfeeding backlash August 6, 2006

    Posted by table4five in BlogHer, Family, Parenting, personal thoughts.

    That’s right, I said BREAST. I apologize if that makes this post NSFW for you, or if your work email filters won’t let you read it at all. But we all have ’em, and we need to talk about them.
    There is a controversy swirling around the latest cover of BabyTalk magazine, which shows the profile of an infant in the act of breastfeeding.

    This is one of those hot-button issues in which mothers seem to be damned if they do and damned if they don’t. Pregnancy and Parenting books and magazines are full of information about why and how to breastfeed. Women fight to have private nursing rooms set aside for them at their workplaces. But what are you supposed to do if you want to actually leave your workplace or home and go somewhere in public? Consider this excerpt from an article at CBSnews.com:

    “It’s a new age,” says Melinda Johnson, a registered dietitian and spokesperson for ADA. “With the government really getting behind breast-feeding, it’s been a jumping-off point for mothers to be politically active. Mommies are organizing. It’s a new trend to be a mommy activist.”

    Ultimately, it seems to be a highly personal matter. Caly Wood says she’s “all for breast-feeding in public.” She recalls with a shudder the time she sat nursing in a restaurant booth, and another woman walked by, glanced over and said, “Ugh, gross.”

    “My kid needed to eat,” says the 29-year-old from South Abingdon, Mass. And she wasn’t going to go hide in a not-so-clean restroom: “I don’t send people to the bathroom when THEY want to eat,” she says.
    That is exactly right. And as for the magazine cover, people do realize that the image was chosen for effect rather than accuracy, right? I have never seen a woman at a restaurant take her top off in order to give Baby unfettered access. There may sometimes be the occasional flash of skin, especially with older babies that like to pull at clothing while eating, but I doubt any nursing mother is intentionally trying to show her breast to the general public.

    The best quote I have seen or heard anywhere on this topic has to come from Suebob‘s Mr. Stapler, who had this reaction to seeing the magazine cover and hearing about the controversy:

    Suebob: It’s ok for other magazine covers to show women with their skirts up to their heez and their plastic boobs covered with 2-inch wide fabric strips…”

    Mr. S: “Yeah. And this…It is someone EATING. It is a baby. It is the most natural human thing on earth. If people can’t get that, if they can’t get past that it is a breast, God help us all. I mean seriously. If they can’t get past that, we have no hope. No hope.”

    A virtual standing ovation to Mr. Stapler, for saying “It is someone EATING.” I strongly encourage you to read the rest of the post, entited “Why We Love Mr. Stapler”. What this world needs is more men like him.

    I found a link on the Huffington Post to a blog post written by Susie Bright.(Careful, this site is definitely NSFW) Ms. Bright is an author and teacher of women’s sexual issues, especially as they relate to politics. She was one of the leaders of a BlogHer session called “Let’s Talk About Sex.” And while the post she wrote pertains to BlogHer, I felt that she made a lot of points that can be applied to the breastfeeding issue. For example:

    Remember when AOL shut down the chat room for breast cancer survivors, because they used the word “breast”?

    And yes, we watch the news about children being bombed to bits, skin flambeing off their bones, because it’s all Absolutely Safe for Work, as long as you don’t show any woman’s tits.

    Why are women nursing their children considered a prelude to a sex panic?

    Every time a woman’s blog proclaims her intellect, her sexuality, and her nurture — all on the same page– she has diced the dominant paradigm.

    The hand that blogs the cradle informs the world –this, the blog-her generation, is the crux of women’s liberation that I thought had passed its due date.

    Another standing ovation, please, for that last sentence. I have been murmuring “The hand that blogs the cradle informs the world” to myself ever since I read it. I would like to put in on a t-shirt, a button, a bumper sticker. I would like to drop a few thousand leaflets printed with it from an airplane.

    Damn it, it is like women’s liberation is moving in reverse. And we, women bloggers, have the power to stop it. Whether you are a Mother or not, you should be concerned that the sight of a photograph of the SIDE of a woman’s breast is causing so much controversy. My next post will be about BlogHer backlash, and how the sight of both a condom and a baby’s bib in the free totebag is causing even more controversy. I can’t be silent about this, and I can’t write a few sentences in which I once again invoke the Golden Rule and ask why we can’t all get along. Nope, this time, I got things to say, and thanks to the Internet, I got a place to say them. Stay tuned.

    The letter I forgot to write. August 3, 2006

    Posted by table4five in BlogHer, Family, personal thoughts.

    Dear Kaitlyn,

    Muffin, Mommy really really missed you while she was gone. I almost couldn’t get on the airplane, because you looked up at me from the back seat of the car, wiggling a little in anticipation of my getting you out of the carseat. I opened the back door and leaned over and tried to kiss you, but you pushed me away with your little hand so I had to hold your hands down and kiss you again. Then, when I closed the car door, you looked at me again with the most puzzled look on your face, as if to say “Mom, you forgot to get me out of the car seat.” And it was all I could do to kiss Daddy goodbye and walk into the airport alone. I took a little photo album with me, full of photos of you and the boys and Daddy, and any time anyone asked me how old my kids were, I whipped out the album and proudly showed you off. Everyone who asked got to see your gorgeous blue eyes, and your sweet blonde curls and those deliciously smoochy cheeks. But the ache, it was there in my chest the whole time. I’ve got a lump in my throat right now just writing this, thinking about it. I hope you know that it was good for Mommy to get away, and play with her grownup friends, but it was equally good for Mommy to come back. I love you, Muffin. And your brothers and your Daddy too. Thanks for letting me go away, and thanks for being here when I came back.


    I know where I’ll be next July 27th. August 1, 2006

    Posted by table4five in BlogHer, personal thoughts.

    It’s official-Blogher ’07 will be held in Chicago! I checked and it is 218 miles from my house, so I will be driving. Oh yes, I am already planning to go. After saying hello to my husband and kissing him in full view of the Gerald R. Ford International Airport, the very next thing I did is tell him “next year, it’s in Chicago.”

    His response? “Great! That will make it even easier for you to go.” I love him, that man of mine.

    You know why else he’s a fantastic guy? Because while I was boozing it up gaining important knowledge at Blogher this year, my husband was not only parenting our three children, and visiting his father in the hospital, he was also painting furniture. Making multiple runs to “the Man store” aka Home Depot for paint. Sanding, painting, parenting. He rocks, that’s all I can say about that.

    Her Bad Mother’s “Dared to Eat a Peach” post perfectly sums up how it felt to spend four days without any members of my family. Last summer, Chris took the boys to see their Grandpa in Indiana for two nights, and he also spent a year and a half traveling on business when the boys were little. But it has been sixteen years since I went somewhere without Chris.

    No wonder I was so unsure of myself. I know, I spent two days running up to everyone and introducing myself, but if you look at the photos I’m in, I look like I’m frozen. There are no photos of me acting crazy and spontaneous, because I just didn’t feel like I could really let go, despite the liberal applications of alcohol.

    Next year will be different. I’m getting back on my diet plan and have a goal of losing forty pounds by January 30. And then if I can just maintain that, great, if I can lose more, even better. I know it shouldn’t matter how much I weigh, but it does. There were women of all shapes and sizes at Blogher, and then ones I envied most were the ones who were overweight like me, yet had tons of confidence and great-looking clothes.

    I looked like someone’s 40 year old mother. Which is what I am, but I’d much rather look like someone’s HOT 40 year old mother. So what I’m saying is that next year, I expect to be a full participant in the boob and ass-grabbing. Because I’m bringing my smokin’-hot 40 year old self to Chicago, and Chicago had better be ready.

    Blogher-Over, but not forgotten July 31, 2006

    Posted by table4five in BlogHer.

    I just got off the phone with Jennster, and we agreed that it’s just as emotional not to be at Blogher as it was to actually be there. I didn’t know what to expect, but I sure didn’t think it would be three days of constant female empowerment. Every meal, every break, every minute of the cocktail parties, there was someone to meet, to talk to, to hug.


    I met my dearest blog friends, who I felt like I had known forever.



    And I met new friends that made me feel so comfortable, so accepted and appreciated.

    Now it’s over, and I feel like I’m in some kind of estrogen withdrawal. I was totally unprepared for how much energy it would take to participate fully in the entire Blogher experience. In a comment to Amy, who had said she needed to start training for next year, I suggested waking up early after drinking all night, and then standing on your feet in a sauna all day. That would be a close approximation of what it feels like to be at Blogher.

    Speaking of Amy, I knew she would be friendly, but I never expected her to make me feel like I was just like her-a blogger, a woman, a mother. It was the same way with Alice, Eden, Jen and Amanda. These are who we think of as the “A-list” bloggers, yet they are not unapproachable. They came to Blogher to meet people just like I did. I heard people say they were too “scared” to introduce themselves, but not me. I figure you’re a blogger, I’m a blogger, we’re not that different. Plus Amanda was holding her beautiful daughter most of the time, and I needed my baby fix after being away from Kaitlyn.

    Speaking of beautiful babies, a big thank you to Gwendomama for letting me fuss over Little E, who should grow up to marry Kaitlyn and make beautiful blonde, blue-eyed children.


    Also, a funny story about Gwen-when I met her, she was telling a story about writing a post with the word “penis” in the title, and how she got a comment from someone who thought it was “inappropriate”. I said that she should go home and change her blog header to read “Gwendomama-Now with more penis”. Look what she did. How awesome is that??!!

    One more thing. Remember when I said Amy was friendly? Well, you know a person feels comfortable with you when you get this reaction to taking their photo:


    I AM A BLOGGER July 31, 2006

    Posted by table4five in Blogging, BlogHer.

    Wondering why I posted Friday afternoon, and then nothing? Because the free Wi-Fi access the hotel gave us only worked once in a while, and almost never for me. There I would sit, having hauled this giant, heavy laptop across the country, watching other people connect to the hotel’s system and not being able to myself. It sucked, sucked, SUCKED.

    But HEY, I’m home now, and it’s only 11:21 pm California time, so my body says I’m not sleepy. And there are no cocktails here, and my body is wondering why I have suddenly plunged it into alcohol withdrawal. Sorry, body. We’ll drink tomorrow, promise.

    Photos are up at Flickr. Please, if I used your real name and you’d prefer I didn’t, EMAIL ME and I will swap it for your URL. It’s no problem.

    Here’s what I have to say overall about blogher ’06-it was overwhelming, it was exhausting, and it was the best thing that has ever happened to me outside of meeting my husband and having my children.  I haven’t had more than one close female friend since leaving High School, and now I have at least a dozen. The feeling of being surrounded by women who were interested in what I had to say, and in me as a person, is indescribable.

    Validated. That is how I feel now that I have been to blogher. Validated. I went from feeling like no one else could possibly know what I mean when I say “um, well, I write a blog. What’s a blog? Well, it’s like a personal website, where I post stories about my family and photos and stuff”, to feeling like I want to climb to the highest rooftop in town and scream “I WRITE A BLOG!”.

    Blogging is not weird. Blogging is not just keeping a diary in online form. Blogging is IMPORTANT. Blogging is powerful, blogging is the future. Being a blogger means being a part of the way women are meeting, supporting, and understanding each other. It’s networking for our social, personal and even professional lives.

    Standing there on Saturday, knowing that there were seven HUNDRED other people around me who knew exactly what it is that I do, was one of the most empowering things that has ever happened to me. Having someone ask me for my business card (I have a card!), look at it and say “Oh, Table for Five! I’ve read your blog!” was absolutely MIND-BLOWING.

    And of all the things I took away from the conference, there are two that have actually changed the path I see for myself. The first is something I took away from the “Mommyblogging is a Radical Act!” session. You wanna hear it? Hear it goes:


    That’s it. It’s that simple. I am PROUD to be a Mommyblogger. Before that session, when asked what my blog was about, I would hem and haw and say things like “well, I blog about my family, and other stuff“, as if it was important to add that qualifier so that the person didn’t think I was “just” a Mommyblogger. And while I’m not “just” a Mommyblogger, as evidenced by my popular Thursday American Idol Recap, or my occasional posts about politics, if I have to define myself in one category, Mommyblogger is what I choose. I titled this post “I am a BLOGGER”, because I no longer feel timid about telling my family (for example), that I write a blog. I may tell them that it is private and that I’d prefer they didn’t read it, but the next time someone asks where I was last weekend, I’m going to proudly say I was at a conference about Blogging.

    The other important, IMPORTANT thing that I brought home from blogher is a realization that my self-esteem needs a big ol’ kick in the ass. For example, all weekend people were declaring that they loved me, loved my blog, were so glad to meet me, and my response to them all was something like this:

    “Hi, I’m Elizabeth. My blog is Table for Five.”

    “Oh, ELIZABETH! I’ve read your blog, I really like it!”

    “No, REALLY? You’ve read my blog? No way.”

    “Elizabeth, it’s really nice to meet you!”

    “No, no, it’s really nice to meet YOU.”

    (Notice the annoying self-deprecation. What the hell is WRONG with me?)

    I relayed this to my husband, and asked him if he thought I was insecure. He said no. So why was it so hard for me to accept the fact that other people were interested in me? Why do I feel so unworthy? Why can’t I just say “Thank you, I’m glad you like my blog” and leave it at that?

    The closing session on Saturday afternoon featured four amazing women who have done great things both with their professional lives, and with blogs. I sat there listening to them speak, and I had what I guess you could call a revelation. I grabbed one of my business cards (because my laptop STILL wasn’t working), and on the back I wrote this:

    1. Find your voice.
    2. Stop apologizing. Be proud of who you are and what you do.
    3.Stop hesitating. Move yourself forward.
    4. You ARE worthy.

    My friends, you are ALL worthy. Whether you have just started blogging or have been at it for a while, you are part of a mighty force in this world. Somewhere out there is someone who wants to know what you think, how you cope, who you are. Be a blogger, and be proud.

    Live from BlogHer ’06!!! July 28, 2006

    Posted by table4five in BlogHer.

    Hey everybody, I’m coming to you live from the lunch table at BlogHer ’06. I’ll spare you the details of my airplane travels, except to say that I did not in fact have a panic attack on either plane, and I met up with Nancy from Mom/Ma’am/Me completely by accident at the Atlanta airport. It was nice to have a friendly and familiar face to pass the time with.

    My companions here at lunch are: Tammie from Soul Gardening, Catherine from Her Bad Mother, Kristen from Motherhood Uncensored, Liz from Mom101, Asha from Parenthacks, Julie from MotherGooseMouse, Cathy from Mayberry Mom, Izzy from Izzymom, Dawn from Baleful Regards, Roo from Roo the Day, and Kari from Karianna/ClubMom. Yes, it’s a huuuuge table!

    I should stop the narrative flow here for a minute and say that last night, when I arrived, it was like 9:30 pm. I ran to my room, threw down my stuff, ran back out to the pool area, and commenced immediately with hugging and squealing. And drinking, which costs a fucking fortune, but helped ease my shaky nerves a little bit. Everyone is so happy to see everyone else, it’s like a High School Reunion only if everyone you went to High School with actually liked you.

    So today, at Registration, I learned that we are actually kind of a big deal. GM is here promoting their website for women, Saturn brought Concept cars for us to test-drive, and SixApart gave us swanky totebags stuffed with swag. We were front-page news here in San Jose. I imagine this must be what it feels like to be a celebrity, people giving you free stuff all the time.

    After a basic Continental breakfast, we had our first discussion session. I went to “Primp Your Blog”, and picked up some interesting ideas, although I can’t use most of them here on my free WordPress blog.

    Now it’s lunch, compliments of the conference. The wireless connection was down all morning but they rebooted, thank GOD.

    I left my SanDisk up in the room, so I’ll upload photos later. I don’t know how well they will look, because anything taken up close is really dark. I’m trying to move farther away, plus I finally turned off the flash. Those photos might be a little blurry, but I can maybe fix that in Photoshop.

    OH, I should also mention that I have met all of the “Big Ladies” except for Heather Armstrong (Dooce), although I hear she’s in the room so I’ll try to at least capture her photo. It’s unbelievable to be sitting in a room full of 400 people, all of whom share a common interest with me.

    Now if I could just calm my nerves and stop shaking like a freak.

    Roo says “Hi”.

    My kids (and hubby) say the darnedest things July 24, 2006

    Posted by table4five in BlogHer, Family.

    Random snippets of conversation heard around my house this week:

    (Sitting around the dinner table) 

    Ryan: “Mom, did you remember to buy earplugs for the plane because otherwise your ears will hurt when the plane lands?”

    Me: “Yes I did, honey, thanks for asking.”

    Ryan: “You should buy some gum.”

    Me: “Unfortunately, chewing gum doesn’t help my ears not hurt.”

    Ryan: “No, not for your ears. You sit down in your seat, you put the ear plugs in, then you chew some gum and it will help you relax.”

    He’s a wise one, that kid.

    (We’re listening to Dixie Chicks “Lullaby”-the lyric is “How long do you want to be loved? Is forever enough? Cause I’m never never giving you up.”)

    Nathan: “Cause I’m never never giving you a hug”? WHAT KIND OF LULLABY IS THAT?”

    Um, the kind Count Olaf would sing to the Baudelaire orphans? 

    (I had just sprayed my arm with Dream Angels “Heavenly” Body spray)

    Me: “Honey, what does this smell like?”

    Chris: (Sniffs) “Um, yummy girl?”

    Good answer there, babe.

    I know, not much of a post, I just wanted to remember those little real-life moments. I wish I had more of them written down somewhere. Like the time when Ryan was about 3, and we were driving up the highway on-ramp into heavy traffic, and he started talking to me. I said “just a minute honey, I need to concentrate on driving and then we can talk”. And he said “okay mama, you drive, and then we’ll have a little talk”.

    Or the time I was feeling down and said out loud “God, I look so fat in this” and Nathan said “Mom, don’t say that. You are beautiful.”

    If you’re going to BlogHer and want my cell phone number and I haven’t given it to you yet, email me. Because I want to find each and every one of you, hug you, and possibly cry a little. I leave in THREE DAYS.