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This One’s More About Lost Than American Idol April 6, 2006

Posted by table4five in Uncategorized.

Thanks to Tanyetta for putting into a phrase what I have today-“Mommy Brain”. You know why I am just now starting my Thursday American Idol Recap? Because I thought it was Wednesday. Even though last night was Wednesday, which I should know because I watched Lost and taped Veronica Mars. I confess, I didn’t even know Mandisa got voted off until people started mentioning it in my comments.

Mandisa being voted off is proof that the people who vote each week are brain-damaged, tone-deaf idiots. (Please don’t slam me for being insensitive to the brain-damaged and tone-deaf, I’m just really pissed). Mandisa has been the most consistent contestant this season. She even managed to sing a country song well. Which is saying a lot, since most of the other performances were just awful.

I swear, if the singing doesn’t seriously improve, and if Kellie “Suds In A Bucket” Pickler doesn’t get voted off soon, I’m never watching AI again. Ever.

I taped Veronica Mars, and hope the VP’s at the CW network will forgive me and not cancel it. I probably won’t get to watch it until tomorrow, unless Princess FussyPants has another bad night, in which case I might be watching it at midnight tonight.

But, Lost! DUDE, Hurley is my boy. He was all Dave’s not imaginary, he’s real, and then Dr. The-Senator-From-XMen whipped out that Polaroid and there was no one there. I didn’t even see that coming, even though it’s the most cliched mental institution plot twist ever.

And of course you know the writers of Lost totally stole that idea from “Buffy”, even if Hurley wasn’t attacked by a demon summoned by the Trio first. Dave’s all Dude, none of this is real, you’re still in the mental hospital, and I turned to Chris and said you know, Buffy did that first.

The food thing did bother me though. First Hurley dumps a bunch of food that could have been used to, you know, feed people, and then more food just drops from the sky? What the huh?

I turned to Chris and said Why would the Dharma Initiative drop food unless they knew someone was on the island? And if they know someone is on the island, why don’t they rescue them? Doesn’t that just prove that this is all a big experiment? Wouldn’t you think Jack or Locke or Sawyer would point that out? And then he told me to shut the hell up and just watch the damn show, and try to remember it’s a TV show and therefore not real. Oh yeah. Sorry.


We had good morning and afternoon, Kaitlyn laid peacefully in her car seat while we went to the Post Office (if you’re waiting for a mix CD, I mailed it), the Salvation Army shop next door, and then fell asleep at the Chinese Buffet which is on the other side of the Post Office. The Chinese Buffet gives you a boatload (or maybe that’s buttload) of food and only charges $5.50 for adults and $.50 per year of age for the boys. So we ate, and ate. Ever had chicken in Peanut Sauce? Ever had something called, no kidding, Fried Dough, which tastes like a white bread roll deep fried and rolled in sugar? So, so delicious.

Then we came home and she took a nap in the swing, and when she woke up, she had been replaced by an alien baby who’s only form of communication is a constant, persistant, open-mouthed cry/whine/hollering sound. She opens her mouth wide and goes “AHHHhhh.AHHHHhhh.MMMmmmm.Ahhuhhahuhh.Mmwwmm.” She doesn’t want to eat. She doesn’t want her diaper changed. She doesn’t want to swing, or bounce, or walk back and forth. She doesn’t want to sit in my lap, or lay on the floor or the couch. She doesn’t want to put toys in her mouth. She just wants to cry and fuss and oh my God I’m going to go INSANE.

Send help. Send Mary Poppins. Send boxes of chocolate and the Season One DVD of Veronica Mars. Just make her stop this infernal crying. Help.



1. Dawn - April 6, 2006

Hey, you seemed to be channeling Emily’s old alter ego – Her Evil Roman Empress – Crankus Maximus.

And oh yeah on the fried dough – with powdered sugar?

May I suggest earplugs? I know, you can’t but GOD wouldn’t they help? I used to fantasize about wearing earplugs every night to bed.

And that was the cruelest shit at the end of Lost – when they pan out and Libby is there too. I was thinking they were in purgatory, but I’m not so sure anymore

2. Elizabeth - April 6, 2006

Dawn-It got so bad that although I started dinner,when my husband came home after his full day at the office and his 40 minute commute, I thrust the baby at him AND asked him to finish cooking. You don’t know how badly I wish I still drank. And smoked.

Ooh, I forgot to mention Libby. I’d really like to know why she’s messing with Hurley’s head like that. That look on her face when they walked away from the cliff-she’s up to something.

3. Mary Tsao - April 6, 2006

When my kids are like that I call them Crabby McCrabbers. It’s a drag. Sorry, honey! Hope she’s down for the night by the time you get this message.

You almost make me want to watch those shows! I love your commentary. I don’t know why I don’t watch them… I think they make me anxious waiting to see who will have to go (AI, Survivor, Amazing Race, etc.) plus I hate waiting for the next week to find out what will happen. I’m too impatient!

4. Elizabeth - April 7, 2006

Mary-“Crabby McCrabbers”, I’m using that one! And if by “down for the night” you mean scream her fool head off from 10-1130 until her parents get in a huge screaming fight over who could do a better job of comforting her, then…wait, never mind.

And glad you like the commentary. I don’t care much for Survivor this season, I think the premise is getting tired. I love Amazing Race but never remember to watch it.

5. Fraulein N - April 7, 2006

I think I’ve fallen in love with Lost all over again. When this show is good, it’s really, really good. Plus, I have all kinds of love for Hurley.

I have no idea what Libby’s deal is, but I’m dying to see her backstory. It’s got to be pretty interesting, don’t you think? I haven’t even decided if I think she remembers Hurley or not. She didn’t look like she had much of an idea what was going on at the hospital. Maybe that look on her face as they were walking away from the cliff was a sign that she’s going to be needing her meds soon?

6. Nancy - April 7, 2006

I am so, so far behind on Lost. I hope to catch up this weekend.

My friend came over last night and her baby was really, really cranky. He just fusses over everything and the only thing that really soothes him is nursing. So I feel for you, it’s tricky when you don’t know what’s going on.

Now I am totally craving Chinese.

7. Elizabeth - April 7, 2006

Fraulein-Yes, Hurley is like Edgar was on ’24’, not the traditional looking lead character, but compelling nonetheless.

As for Libby, I think Hurley told her the whole story about the mental hospital and she recognized the name of it and the Doctor. Isn’t her backstory that she used to be a nurse or something?

Nancy-You’ll be able to fast-forward through most of the last few episodes, but you’ll want to pay attention to this last one.

And this was some good Chinese Food. Strips of fried chicken breast coated in Peanut Butter Sauce. Honey chicken, sesame chicken, beef with broccoli and carrots. Hungry now? 🙂

8. TB - April 7, 2006

Hang in there Elizabeth. I’m sorry she’s in a fussy stage. Hopefully it will pass SOON!

9. halloweenlover - April 7, 2006

Maybe she doesn’t like Chinese food? I hope it passes asap too!

10. jen - April 7, 2006

THis has been my thought on ALL shows that live/die by votes. Call in for the guy/gal you want OFF. Usually, there’s more agreement and more reflective of the audience’s wants. Esp. when music is so sujective and people are great and there’s so may styles…
It’s more obvious as to who is the worst when there’s a larger group. It’s too divisive the other way. I think there would be a lot more saves of talent that way.

Maybe at the end when there’s 3 left you vote FOR and not against…but when you have 10 or so…

11. Elizabeth - April 7, 2006

Teebs-Thanks. I hope so.

Miss Halloween-Boy I sure hope NOT!

Jen-You may be on to something. I’ve only voted once, by text message because you can not get through on the phone. I think people use those auto-dialers and jam the phone lines.

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